blessed release
16 April 2022
I’ve sometimes thought to myself, “everything is possible at night.” That thought has occurred to me when I’ve been up very late, and it seems like the whole world is asleep. The most incredible plans, the wildest ideas, all seem to be quite capable of being accomplished. There’s the sudden, “Yes! Why didn’t I think of that before?” And then when sleep comes, it seems like everything is figured out. All is right with God and the world.
And then the cold light of morning forces open eyelids that aren’t quite ready to be opened. The mental cobwebs disappear, and a sudden realization takes hold. What a stupid idea that was! What in the world was I thinking? What seemed so clear and so true and so sensible now seems so unclear and so wrong and so ridiculous.
I wonder if the disciples had any similar thoughts. Jesus had, after all, on occasion made strange statements about being risen from the grave. What on earth could that mean? Did they understand him correctly? Is it possible in those dark, lonely, sorrowful hours before dawn that any of them dared to entertain such notions?
John 20 points us to Mary Magdalene, who ventured out to the tomb of Jesus before sunrise. The other gospels say she wasn’t alone. She was accompanied by other women, including Mary the mother of James. According to the Jewish burial custom, they intended to anoint the body of Jesus. Still, I wonder what thoughts filled their minds during that terrible and heart-breaking evening.
Mary Magdalene has received a lot of bad press throughout the centuries. It’s been claimed she had formerly been a prostitute, an allegation stated nowhere in the Bible. (Though, even if it were true, wouldn’t it be a good thing if she had left that life?) What is stated is that she had been demon possessed (Lk 8:2). Some people have said she’s the sinful woman of Luke 8 who washes the feet of Jesus with her hair (vv. 36-50) or that she’s the woman caught in adultery in John 8 (vv. 1-11).
In her blog, “Here’s a Story,” Ashley Buenger takes Biblical characters and events and infuses them with her vision and imagination, bringing them to life. Here’s an excerpt from her story about Mary and her struggle with demons.[1]
{I have altered the spacing of some of the sentences.}
“I scramble to the jar [I just threw], it’s shattered. Perfect, I think. No, wait. Whose jar is this? Why have I broken it? I pick up a shard and I scrape it along the top of my foot. I see the red beads of blood glisten and I’m delighted. I’m bleeding. So beautiful, I stare at it. Then I take a sharp edge to my palm.
“Stop it. I say to them. But they never listen. They never give heed to what I want. Get out of here. I say to them but they laugh at me and snarl. I can see their teeth in my head. Oh, Mary. They taunt me. Silly Mary. You’re ours. We won’t leave.
“I pick up another piece of pottery and put it between my teeth. I chomp down on it as hard as I can. I wince as I feel a tooth break. They laugh and place another piece in my mouth. It’s getting worse. I push, they push back, I push again, they push back again. Sometimes I win. But not often and not lately. It’s been too long. I’m too tired to fight. They have taken over this body. I’m no longer Mary… I don’t know half the things I do.
“Look what you’ve done to me, I say to them. We’ve made you better, they say and laugh, we’ve made you prettier. They take me to a booth where a man is selling mirrors. See? They say. Gorgeous. I am horrified. My face is sunk and my eyes are empty, there are deep wounds on my cheeks. Chunks of my hair are missing. What is left hangs limp and dirty around my face. I don’t even recognize myself…
“The air shifts and the hair on my neck tingles, I stand up straight and look around. Someone is coming. Someone important. The demons are stirred. I stumble to the wall and then back and to the wall again.
“There he is, that’s him. Who is he?… ‘Jesus of Nazareth,’ they yell from my mouth. ‘We know who you are. The son of the Most High God.’
“‘Come out of her.’ Jesus says. ‘Now.’
“My body shakes and they shriek as they leave. It smells like burning flesh for a moment and then they are gone. There were seven of them.
“I look up and into the face of my healer. He stands before me with his hand out to me. I take it, wincing at the pain of the gashes in my palm. ‘Hi Mary.’ He says to me. And I stare at him. My name from his lips is like a song. The most beautiful melody that I had ever heard. It is a song of freedom.
“I am Mary again.”
Mary is given a blessed release.
By the way, I sent a comment to Ashley saying, “I love your portrait of the demons as spiteful little punks.” At the end of the day, that’s really what they are.
The scripture reading of that first Easter morning describes the event that earned Mary Magdalene the name “apostle to the apostles,” no longer the Mary with seven devils. She peeks into the tomb, even while she’s crying tears of sorrow. She’s greeted by two angels who ask her why she’s crying. Mary’s answer shows how confused she is as to how all this can be happening.
No sooner has she answered their question than she turns and sees Jesus himself. Says G. H. C. Macgregor, “There follows the greatest recognition scene in all literature—and one told in two words!”[2] (Jesus says, “Mary.” She says, “Rabbouni,” meaning teacher.) “The greatest recognition scene in all literature.” (Why doesn’t he tell us how he really feels?)
She sees him, but she doesn’t recognize him. Thinking he’s the gardener, Mary figures he can explain the missing body of Jesus.
Why doesn’t Mary recognize him? One suggestion is it was still too dark, but that doesn’t seem very likely. After all, the disciples on the road to Emmaus spend a long time with Jesus before realizing who he is (Lk 24:13-35). It’s not until Jesus speaks her name that the veil over Mary’s mind is lifted.
Nadia Bolz-Weber has her own take on this recognition scene.[3]
“See, when Mary Magdalene, this imperfect woman, stood at the tomb, she didn’t encounter some perfected radiant glowing Jesus that morning. Seriously, no offense to gardeners but Jesus couldn’t have been looking all that tidy and impressive if she mistook him for a gardener. And here’s the thing: I like to think that Mary Magdalene mistook the resurrected Christ for a gardener because Jesus still had the dirt from his own tomb under his nails.”
That really speaks volumes about the incarnation. In Jesus, we have God appearing on earth in flesh, God appearing as matter—this earthly, dirty stuff. No angel, no vision, but the physical body and blood of Jesus. In a few moments, we will eat the flesh and drink the blood of Christ in the Sacrament of the Lord’s Supper, the Eucharist. (That’s the Greek word appearing many times in the New Testament which means “giving thanks.”)
How can we describe the intensity of the moment that follows? In what must have been a flood of shock and joy, Mary cries out to the one she dearly loved. There are other writings from the early church, besides the New Testament, that speak of the relationship that existed between Jesus and Mary Magdalene. They speak of a relationship, one of intimate friendship. Some even go so far as to suggest a romantic bond.
The scripture presents her as turning twice. In verse 14, she “turns” and sees Jesus, though as mentioned before, she doesn’t recognize him. In verse 16, upon hearing her name spoken, she “turns” and speaks to Jesus with unbounded wonder. She turns from grief to hope. She turns from sorrow to joy.
Though the Bible doesn’t use that word, she turns—she returns—and brings the good news to the others. Of course, they don’t take her word for it. Sometimes even an apostle to the apostles isn’t believed!
Mary Magdalene is a fitting picture for Easter, for resurrection. She, in effect, has been raised from the dead. She has been freed from her demons. She once was blind, but now she sees.
It’s been said that it’s “possible for Jesus to be present, and yet for [us] not to recognise him until his word goes home to [us].”[4]
“Until his word goes home.” It’s not enough to hear about Christ or to be taught the meaning of the resurrection. We can learn ways to understand the scriptures; we can learn the doctrines of the church—and these are important. But hearing about Jesus won’t produce belief. We must hear from Jesus. And hearing from Jesus Christ means hearing the good news of his love. That is the word that goes home.
And that is the word spoken to Mary Magdalene when Jesus calls her by name. It’s like those three-dimensional pictures that are hidden in the midst of a bewildering array of other images. You have to let your eyes remain unfocused. Straining to find the 3-D picture won’t do any good. And it can be maddening. You’re looking right at it, but you can’t see it!
When Jesus speaks his word, he no longer is a gardener. He no longer is a traveler on the Emmaus road. When he speaks his word, he can be seen as the risen Lord who comes to us even now, in every moment of life.
So the next time you find yourself awake in the midst of the darkest of nights, think to yourself that anything is possible at night—even the impossible. For it was before the sun had yet shown its face that the light of the world emerged from the darkness of the tomb.
[1] ashleybuenger.substack.com/p/mary-magdalene?s=r
[2] G. H. C. Macgregor, The Gospel of John (New York: Harper and Brothers, 1928), 358.
[3] thecorners.substack.com/p/its-actually-pretty-easy-to-mistake?s=r
[4] Rudolf Bultmann, The Gospel of John (Philadelphia: Westminster Press, 1971), 686.
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